31 Day Challenge - Day 30

"Every word of God proves true. He is a shield to all who come to him for protection", (Proverbs 30).
Not some words, or a few words or even most words, but every word of God proves true! I love this scripture! If I want to find out more about God, I try His word. When I need to get closer, I can stand on His promises, on His very words! Every word He declares is proved true and I can take that to the bank!

How do I know if I heard from God? I look for truth; in His word and in His direction. When you read God's word, you know it's true - God can not lie. If you believe God is giving you direction, you can test it and if the very word you believe you've heard comes to pass and it produces good fruit in your life and brings you closer to Him,  you can trust it is from His hand no matter what it looked like when you got it.

In  1991, I sensed I was about to make a change concerning my job. I did not hear an audible voice, and yet I could discern in my spirit that God had spoken to me. I did what I do when I believe I've heard from the Lord, I tuck it away and wait for God's revalation. In 91', things were changing on the job and I had an opportunity to start a new position. I immediately began to think that this was the change I had been sensing, but as it turned out, it was a piece to the puzzle and not the change at all. It all made sense, the word from God, this new opportunity, but in the end, it did not prove to be what God was saying. During this time, Glenn had just been promoted to a job with less flexibility and with two small children, we needed flexibility in a job so that we could tend to the needs of the family, ie. illness, doctors appointments, etc.  My current position at the time, was not flexible either; Glenn was the one who could pick up the children. But now Glenn needed me to be the prominent care provider, so when this  new opportunity came up, I was sure it was from God. The new position was flexible, with no travel and a strict 8 - 5 shift, it all made sense, it was a done deal. But that's not what God had in store. Instead, He was providing a way for me to come home (a great story of God's faithfulness, but too long for this particular blog entry). As God continued to reveal His plan, change came in less than a month and it was what my heart had desired! It turned out to be a company buy out for me and we were able to pay off all of our debt which allowed me to become a stay at home mom. In 1992, the Lord told me to prepare for another child. I began getting fit right away, but almost gave up because Lindsey didn't come for another five years. In 1993, the Lord told Michael, our son, that we would move to California - we did, but not until 2001. In 1994, the Lord told Glenn through a dream that we would be moving to New Jersey. We didn't embrace it, but a couple months later, we were on our way to Wanaque, a small city one hour from NYC.  In 2004, we felt another nudge for a change. We hadn't heard anything, so in July we decided to put our house on the market, a move of faith for us. There were no nibbles on the house, though it was during the housing bubble, but one month later Glenn got an invitation to interview in Nebraska. Our home sold in less than a week. Again, in 2013, we heard the Lord say a change was coming. We had been looking for a new home in our current area just a year before and thought we had found the "perfect" home, but we did not make an offer because God relayed to Glenn in yet another dream that we would be moving out of state. We did not know when that would be, and at times it appeared that it was not going to happen, but we waited on the Lord to reveal His plan. That was in the spring of 2012; we got the word of Glenn's promotion to Arizona late spring, 2013, one year later.

Though all of these examples were about moving, I chose them because they denoted major changes in our lives. In theses examples, God spoke to us through His word, through dreams, through our children and through each other. How did we know it was God? Because the word, however it came, stood the test of time and brought with it God's blessing and spiritual growth. And even though blessing and growth don't always look nice or feel good at first, (sometimes they're painful and undesireable), they always produce good fruit and they always bring us closer to the One who provides them!

31 Day Challenge - Day 29

"To discipline a child produces wisdom, but a mother is disgraced by an undisciplined child" (Proverbs 29:15). "Discipline your children, and they will give you peace of mind and will make your heart glad" (Proverbs 29:17).

Throughout the scriptures it is evident that the Lord wants us to discipline our children, but I have been confused, at times, about the ways I was not disciplining my children. The on-line Dictionary by Farley describes the word discipline as the following: 1. Training expected to produce a specific character or pattern of behavior, especially training that produces moral or mental improvement; 2. Controlled behavior resulting from disciplinary training; self-control; 3. To train by instruction and practice, especially to teach self-control to; 4. To teach to obey rules or accept authority; 5. To punish in order to gain control or enforce obedience; 6. To impose order on. A sense of preparing comes to mind when I read these definitions; we are preparing our children to obey God and to take their place in His kingdom.

‎

Discipling does not come easy. Children don't understand how difficult it is for parents to train them up. In addition, if we're not using the Bible as our guide book, we can become confused with how to administer discipling techniques. Two things that needed to be corrected in my discipling practices when bringing up my older childre were my forgetfulness of punishments I had prescribed and my wavering "No" that the children quickly figured out could be manipulated into a "yes". My forgetfulness allowed the dishonesty in children to rise up and not remind me of a punishment I had established for them. I wouldn't remember until after the punishment had been broken and the child was able to do that which they had been told they could not, (even if I had written it on the family calendar). Don't get me wrong, I did have the honest child that alerted me to their restrictions, (and sometimes others), but I also had the child who didn't "remember" until I brought it up. I'm not sure why I would forget, but it could have been that the punishment wasn't a good fit for the crime. What may really have been needed at the time was a consequence (something I learned during the second decade of bringing up children).

The wavering "No" resulted in my children's ability to elicit a "yes" after much finagling. I would say no to a certain request, but would soften after repeated questioning and debates, and end with a "yes".  The scripture tells us "to let our "no" mean no and our "yes" mean yes", obviously a word that escaped me at the time. It is better to follow through with a no then to give in, even if we feel we've made a mistake in judgement concerning a punishment. We can always (and should) ask for forgiveness if we find ourself in error, but following through allows the child to learn they can not manipulate their parent, no matter what (because moms no always means no) and a child who learns to accept a "no" becomes an adult who knows how to handle disappointment in responsible and respectful ways.